Donington Park is to be re-named Turpin Park following the daylight robbery going on at the hoof'n'ringpiece burger stands. Five-hundred and fifty of your new new pence for a bacon roll and a bottle of pop. Even the wallets at Motorcycle News were complaining...
Simon Andrews has got a new lucky charm... in the shape of a pair of red, lacy pants as worn by Big Brother contestant Amy Alexandra. Possibly. Well, he has got them, it's only possible, and wishful thinking on the part of Andrews' right-hand man Charlie, that she has worn them.
Vernon Kay-alike Michael Howarth, who may or may not be from Bolton, looks set for a return to the BSB paddock sooner rather than later but resolutely refuses to say in what class, on what make of bike or anything else. Well, he said a lot else, but none of it had anything to do with racing. Or Bolton.
Leon Camier has been wearing a lot of spandex recently. Take from that what you will.
Ian Lowry discovered that someone had nicked his team's footpump over the weekend as his tyres were running at the wrong pressure which had buggered his setup for qualifying. When the Pirellis were set to the correct psi, the former chef had a storming pair of results.
Supersport Cup man David "Monkey" Hallett finally wheeled his new girlfriend out this weekend, and then promptly locked her in the caravan in case I cleared off with her. No trust, some people.
The Honda chocolate crankshaft problem looks like it is rearing its ugly head again. One team owner, who wishes to remain nameless, didn't say much but the look was enough.
At the risk of upsetting the big man, I understand Colin Wright was spotted moisturising in his hospitality suite while partaking of an espresso on Sunday morning.
During one of my infrequent visits to the track's media shed, a loud buzzer went off prompting one hack to quip: "Is that the Donington Park lawsuit alarm?" If it is, I am surprised it hasn't run out of batteries.
There was a rumour knocking about the paddock that Alastair Kennedy is about to blow the dust off the NW200 Ducatis but that was stymied today when someone who should know better admitted that Kennedy had done an excellent job of winding him up.
Karl Harris's reasonably-spectacular engine blow up wasn't caused by anything, erm, spectacular. It was a snapped Jubilee clip on the bottom of the rad. No luck, boys.
Parkalgar Honda crew chief Brains was spotted mooching about the paddock on Saturday and Sunday which means one of two things: a) Lots of people had the piss taken out of them and didn't know it or b) See a.
Airwaves PR girl Shelley. Ding-dong.
Following a quick straw poll, it has been decided the standard of brolly girls is in a bigger recession than Zimbabwe. Except for Danni and Vicky at Raceways and MSS respectively. This is obviously not my opinion. Oh no.
GOSSIP LEFT OVER FROM BRANDS HATCH AND OULTON PARK
Simon Andrews has sorted out his perfect preparation for qualifying. Guitar Hero on the Ninteno Wii. Although he did complain of thumb pump after an extended version of the Oasis classic Some Might Say.
Karl Harris exfoliates. Absolutely true.
In what surely must be a personal best performance, the undoubtedly long-suffering husband of legendary PR lady Helen Pask doggedly fought his way to the end of a sentence, and was having a bash at a second one, on Sunday night before he was told to sit down and shut up. Norris McWhirter, via a medium, has been informed.
