Mechanics in the newly-named Alstare "Elkie" Brux Suzuki garage were left slightly peturbed when packing up on Sunday night as they found a few dummies laying around the place.

The mystery was swiftly solved, however, when the Italian media revealed they had been spat by the squad's erstwhile owner Francis "Fanny" Batta over the legality of the new Aprilia.

Apparently, he reckons the RSV4 is a prototype because it isn't for sale yet and is, therefore, not eligible to race. He made no mention of the BMW, which is in the same boat but has far more advanced electronics.

Was that a Foggy Petronas FP-1 I just saw ride past my office? Ah...

Speaking of the BMW team, I wonder if they got their crayons mixed up and marked Troy Corser's race tyres as qualifiers and vice-versa. The Aussie failed to make an impact in the first part of Superpole, and then his rear tyre lasted just a single lap in the second race...

Right. Superpole. Three sessions. Two qualifying tyres. Go as fast as you can. What's difficult about it?

Broc Parkes and Makoto Tamada couldn't use their qualifying tyres at Phillip Island as the compound makes the ZX-10R chatter so much, Parkes' sunglasses nearly came off.

Pirelli managed some vintage racing in the Supersport class by managing to bring some vintage tyres to the race. Whoever loads up their truck filled it with tyres from 2006 for the 600s, not 2009...

Italian teams and press releases. I think they must talk to their English riders (in this case Shane Byrne), translate what has been said into Italian (using Google Language tools) so they understand it and then translate it back into English (using a pelican) because there is no way Byrne actually said this:  "I tried to hold trajectory but the steering wheel locked up and I crashed. Nevertheless, I started to understand how hard-fought the SBK is, especially in the first laps". Not enough swearing in it, for a start...

Rubbish excuses we have heard: Yukio Kagayama had a problem with his left boot in race two and was struggling to use the quick-shifter, so didn't do very well.

Paying attention at the back: Leon Haslam and the pitlane speed limiter. It's a button on your handlebars, mate. $200 contribution to the Paolo Flammini red wine fund.