Diminutive Spaniard Dani Pedrosa is screwed in more ways than one. He will miss the upcoming Jerez tests because of the surgery on his wrist and knee. He had to have a titanium screw banged in his radius bone and have some "matter" removed from his patella. So, Pedrosa will have had the best part of no pre-season testing at all because of crashes which will give him another genius excuse for not winning anything at all.

Tech3 Yamaha's deal with Monster energy drinks is a headline writer's dream: Toseland in Monster Crash. Edwards puts in Monster qualifying time. What that's coming over the Hill, is it a Poncheral... Ah, that doesn't quite work.

Speaking of Toseland, he says he is still lacking in confidence after his, erm, monster highside at Sepang. I, for one, am not bloody surprised. Pundits across the web have already written the youngster off as a no-hoper, but anyone who knows James will understand that he really never gives up. Give him a break.

Toseland's new crew chief Gary Reynders has invented a new tyre problem. Hopping is the new chatter, apparently. Toseland's front tyre is experiencing a "hopping movement under braking. We have tried a lot of different settings without really solving the issue". Which must be pleasing the rider no end.

Edwards, meanwhile, still won't leave the crew chief swapping issue alone, taking every opportunity to have a poke at his underperforming team-mate with comments like: "Things are going great with Guy Coulon". Leave it.

Casey Moaner has confirmed that both he and Nicky Hayden ran a new carbon fibre swing-arm at Qatar. Both riders deemed it stable. Thanks for that insight, gents.

It still isn't known whether Marco Melandri will be riding the Bad Wind at MotoGP's opening round at Qatar. He was second fastest on the Artist Formerly Known As Kawasaki during day one, but predictably and understandbly slid down the order as time progressed. What's positive is that he wasn't 10 seconds off the pace.

Repsol Honda's Andrea Dovizioso suffered from bad chatter for most of the three day test. Nothing to do with setup, Alberto Puig's small boy had to go home, so Dovi was the next nearest target.

Toni Elias was not at all happy with his setup through the entire test. He tried various different chassis and geometry configurations, which didn't work. And then some radical solutions, which didn't work either. Ah.

Due to the new testing ban, Bridgestone had some 2010-spec tyres at the track. Some of the rubber present at Qatar will form part of next season's MotoGP allocation. There some forward thinking, Carmelo.

Nicky Hayden did a lot of laps in practice, loved the swingarm and did a bike-switching practice just in case it rains during the season. Thorough, Nicky. Like it.